Presidential Debate #4: The Last Debate

I zipped this off with 10 minutes left at work. This is it for the debate series. It's also Elena's going away party. Sad.


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Loddy Doddy I love to party
Cause alot of trouble and bother everybody
6 6 6, nobody likes it when I kick it like this
Loddy Doddy, it's the democratic party
McCain done come and fuck everybody
6 6 6, nobody likes it when I kick it like this

HIt it!
I want to rock right now. (holdup.)
Hit it!
Got my man barack right now
20 more days and it's time to get down
And he's ill/ he's internationally known
And he's known to rock the microphone
Cause McCain is stoopid, and you know he rages
And his voters can't seem to engage us
And Barack's got the promises and maybe the answers
And his Veep's got some hair enhancers
Ahead in the polls, Ten points he rolls
And McCain's numbers aint done nothing but fall
I like the way that shit's come loose
Sarah Palin's done shot up another moose
So.

Loddy Doddy I love to party
Cause alot of trouble and bother everybody
6 6 6, nobody likes it when I kick it like this
Loddy Doddy, it's the democratic party
McCain done come and fuck everybody
6 6 6, nobody likes it when I kick it like this

Hit it!
So it's time for the third debate
And everyone knows that McCain's too late
But I gotta give you a little fair warning
Since the other party's got a shit storm coming
They're gonna play the real dirty blame game
They all say Baracks' just all about celeb fame
And they'll talk about Ayers
And they'll talk about Wright
And they'll talk about ACORN
But it's all the same they're trying to put a little fright.
But it's all the same
I see McCain calling it a night.

So.
Loddy Doddy I love to party
Cause alot of trouble and bother everybody
6 6 6, nobody likes it when I kick it like this
Loddy Doddy, it's the democratic party
McCain done come and fuck everybody
6 6 6, nobody likes it when I kick it like this

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Debate food report

Bunch o' bottles of beer
Bruschettas of tomato and basil by Elena
Broiled potatoes by Elena
Grilled padrone peppers!
And Sean's special Dutch bitterballen!!! Look he has a recipe and photos from my kitchen.
Oh and Elena's apple crumble dessert

Drunk factor: meh...

The bitterballen were so much more interesting than the actual debate. Expecting more guests at the debate party/farewell Elena bash, Sean arrived promptly at 5:30 with a bowl of meat mix (I hereby dub the bowl Gigantor). And while we struggled with keeping the deepfry at a constant 370 degrees fahrenheit, the bitterballen came out all crispy on the outside and gooey on the inside. Awesome. So much thanks to Sean for bringing over Gigantor and making us bitterballen.

Presidential Debate #3: Town Hall and the Hawaii vs. Arizona Burger Battle

It's time for this week's edition of my debating rap. Debate is 6PM on Tuesday. We're watching it at our place...We might barbecue too. I might make burgers (since Andrea's presence has shocked me out of my burger making leave of absence). Come on by if you want.

Check check... One two. Check check.

So. I'm not as prolific as my man Jay Z.
But I gotta keep it going cause McCain is crazy.
And I know I'm running out of time
Trying to sell a busted rhyme
But this time this time
Got my tequila and some lime
If McCain is Megatron Obama's Optimus Prime
So last week I had my snacks and drinks
And Palin had her fur minks
In four weeks I'll have Cor-vaw-see-yay
I'll say "Prost!" The glass clinks
So the old grandpa he's starting to freak
Tossin out his message going all negative
Need his metamucil now it's his laxative
And again the Keating five's a gift continuing to give
Because the shits hit the fan for him
And his message was always all wack and dim
And he can't spout any change
And his chances are slim
Running on empty he don't got no sanity
Maybe he'd have done better had he chosen Tim Pawlenty
But I'm not bemoaning this turn of the events
Only place safe for him is Fox with Sean Hannity
Michigan is gone and now he defends the red states
And on tuesday a town hall number two of the debates
At 6PM Tuesday night one-oh-five on Younger Way
We're gonna hit it on the DVR doesn't matter if you're lates
Now I'm not so sure about the next moderatuh
It's NBC the original G Tom Brokaw
In the tank with John McCain, G's a democrat hatuh
But the polls they say it's time MacDaddy seeyou latuh.

Uhuh. Uhuh.

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Debate food report

big bottle of wine
lots of bottles of beer
Afsaneh's rice
Salad with bunch o walnuts, cranberries and swiss chard
No drinking games. Just drink.

The Hawaii vs. Arizona Burger Battle

Recipes are below. The Hawaiian pineapple teriyaki was pretty good. I'm not sure which burger won. Some people liked the versatility of the dry-rubbed burger (it went well over the Iranian rice dish that we also had-- but a burger with rice and no bun is not an American burger in my books). Yet another person claimed that the Hawaiian pineapple teriyaki sauce went very well over the Arizona burger but that's just too easy. While non-exceptionalism is okay, we like our burgers to challenge us by themselves.

I needed:
2 pounds of grassfed chuck, divided into two batches
formed into sliders, about 4 ounces each

Hawaii: Pineapple teriyaki soy marinade

• 1 (14 ounce) can pineapple chunks, with no sugar added juice
• 6 garlic cloves, chopped
• 1 inch ginger, peeled and chopped
• 1/2 cup soy sauce
• 2 tablespoons mirin
• 3 dashes sesame oil
• 1 teaspoon crushed red chili pepper (probably closer to 1 1/2)
• 1/2 cup brown sugar

1. Mix all in saucepan
2. Simmer for five minutes
3. Blend with immersion blender


Arizona: Southwestern Spice Rub

• 1 tablespoon cumin seeds
• 1 teaspoon coriander seeds
• 8 dried chilies -- stemmed and seeded
• 1 tablespoon brown sugar
• 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
• 1/4 teaspoon ground red pepper

1. Cook cumin and coriander seeds in a small skillet over low heat, stirring constantly, for 3 minutes.
2. Combine seeds, chilies, and remaining ingredients in a blender; process until mixture resembles coarse powder.

Presidential Debate #2: The Veeps

Here's this week's stupid rap.

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It's debating time again on Thursday night at six. So we know what that means-- I have to make another installment of the debatin raps. Today we do the old skool flava at the IHOP on Younger Way.

(cue the two turntables, got the microphone going)
It's on. You don't stop.
Lets-up-jump-the-boogie-to-the-bang-bang-boogie
We-got-VPs-on-the-telly. Yall think you can defeat me?
Well its on. Let's rock now, you don't stop. Keep on. You don't stop.

I got I got I got I got snacks and drinks
She got some fur minks
Five kids on ice rinks
I don't gotta stop and think.
Doncha think? I'll get back to ya
What? That aint no answa
Gotta check with her old senate poppa
Sucka MCs don't get much higha
Hockey mom and hockey skates
Hocka-loogy this-uh high stakes
Hock my watch I think I'll do
The economy is poo.
We got debatin we ain't kiddin
Cuz she's chillin like a villin.
Thursday IHOP on Younger Way
You know USA aint A-OK
My man Joe Biden on the stump
Smilin like an old fool
He'll run his mouth off and kick the Palin bump
Say "You're fired" like the Trump
So six o clock no time for hatin
Rearin his head it's Mr. Putin
We gotta pop it like a palin
Now it's high time for debatin

It's on. You don't stop.
Lets-up-jump-the-boogie-to-the-bang-bang-boogie
We-got-VPs-on-the-telly. Yall think you can defeat me?
Well its on. Let's rock now, you don't stop. Keep on. You don't stop.

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Food report

Big bottle of wine
Lots of bottles of beer
Fruit
Bunch o' Trader Joe's pizzas (tarte flambes)
Chips and salsa
Debate Night Bingo but I was told there was a better one here.

Drunk factor: high

Presidential Debate #1

I figure with the debates coming up, and with my crispy new television, we have great reasons to imbibe and eat.

Verbatim from the email sent 9/25/08...

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I just wanted to share my little rap because I think I'm proud of my rapping abilities. Jay-Z is going down.

(cue the human beatbox in the background, two turntables and a microphone)

Not waitin for debatin
If it aint happin there be sumtin
It's for real, we're not playin
Maybe some hatin for McCaiiii----- tin

Yo. You can't just suspend a campaign
Like the RNC for a little rain
Down in NoLa hurricain
I guess it got heat off Sarah Paaiiiiiiii---lin

So six o clock this comin Friday
My man O to the B to the A-M-A
Mack Daddy'n DC, that's just crappay
Economic ca-tas-tro-phay
We'll be watchin the debatin
This comin Friday I'm just sayin
If it happins let it happin
Come on over we'll be watchin

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Ahem.

Debate food report

big bottle of wine
many bottles of beer
drinking game
cheese and crackers
chips and salsa

drunk factor: high